5.6.07

According to the most up-to-date scientific analysis, I'm 72% Barbie

Own:
[ X] You own over 10 bottles of nail polish
[X ] You own perfume that cost over $60
[ X] You had/have fake nails
[ X] You have more hair products than you can use
[X ] You have enough clothes to cover an entire refugee camp.
[ ] You have enough pictures to create your own wallpaper.
Total: 5
Do you:
[ X] Have/had a hair color that is not your natural color
[ ] Have “blonde moments” at least once a day
[X ] Constantly keep your phone at your side
[X ] Dance around in your room when nobody else is home
[ ] Refuse to go out in public without makeup
Total: 3
DO YOU ADORE:
[ X] Makeup
[ X] Glitter
[ ] The Color Pink
[X ] Shopping
[X ] Jewelery
[ X] Mirrors
[ ] Chick flicks
[X ] Shoes
[ ] Rainbows
[ ] Unicorns
[ ] Disney Movies
[X ] Candles
[X ] Flowers
[ ] Stuffed Animals
[X ] Purses
[X ] Boots
[X ] Starbucks
Total: 11
DO YOU SAY:
[X ] Whatever.
[ X] Oh my gosh/goodness/god
[ X] Hun/honey
[ X] That’s hot
[ ] Dunzo
[ X] Darling
[ ] Psh
[ ] Cutie
[X ] Hottie
[ ] Totally
[ ] Fer Shur
[X ] Fabulous
[ ] hell ya
[ ] like
[ ] duh
Total: 7
Do You Read:
[ ] Cosmopolitan/Cosmo Girl
[ ] Cleo
[ ] Marie Claire
[X ] Elle
[ X] Vogue
[ ] Dolly
[ ] Girlfriend
[ ] Teen Vogue
[ ] Famous
[ ] New idea
[ ] NW
[ ] Madison
[ ] Who
[ X] PerezHilton.com
Total: 3
Have you Seen These:
[ X] Legally Blonde
[ ] Elizabethtown
[ X] Mean Girls
[X ] Now & Then
[ ] The Notebook
[X ] A Walk to Remember
[ ] Sweet Home Alabama
[ ] Where the Heart is
[ ] Just my luck
[ ]John Tucker Must Die
[ ] Centerstage
[ X] Bring it On
[X ] How to Lose a Guy in 10 Days
[X] Mona Lisa Smile
Total: 7
Are you/ have you been Addicted to…
[ ] LOST
[ ] America’s Next Top Model
[ ] Project Runway
[ X] Desperate Housewives
[ XXXX] The Simple Life
[ ] Next pussycat doll
[ ] 8th & Ocean
[ XXXXX] Grey’s Anatomy
[ ] The O.C.
[ ] Laguna Beach/The Hills
[ ] Nip/Tuck
[ ] Gilmore Girls
[ ] Veronica Mars
[ ] One tree hill
Total: 3
ALL TOTAL:
COUNT UP HOW MANY YOU CHECKED. MULTIPLY BY 2
THEN REPOST I AM…% BARBIE


I AM 72% BARBIE.

Do you love it?

A 200 Question Fun Survey 4 Myspace (All The Bzoink Surveys Put Together)
Full Name::Julia Sherwood Murphy
Birthday::09/10/1985
Birthplace::Philadelphia
Eye Color::Blue
Hair Color::Caramelish
Height::6'0
Weight::~150
Right handed or Left handed?:right
Your Heritage::too complicated for this amount of space, and open to speculation anyway
My Worst Habit::self-endulgence
Zodiac Sign::Virgo
Shoe Size::10
Pants Size::8
Innie or Outie?:innie
Parents Still Together?:yes, albeit it closest when at eachother's throats
The Shoes You Wore Today::gold ballet flats
Your Weakness::shopping
Your Fears::monsters that linger in dark spaces
Your Perfect Pizza::cheese, liberally sprinked with JD and coke
Goal You Would Like To Achieve This Year::be in a stable relationship of some kind, and not feel claustrophobic
Your Most Overused Phrase On An Instant Messenger:btw
Thoughts First Waking Up::fuck
Your Best Physical Feature::while i would love to say something like "the brilliant mind that shines through my pupils like a thousand suns," most agree its my boobs. oh well.
Your Bedtime::i don't sleep
Your Most Missed Memory::being happy
MY FAVORITES
Favorite color?:black and deep blue
Food?:vodka
Sport?:shopping
Animal?:puppies
Ice Cream?:vanilla
Candy?:ring pops, for sure
Store?:hmmmm....that's impossible to answer.
Salad Dressing?:anything spicy
Actor?:Olivier Martinez
Song?:Again, impossible for me to answer
Letter?:K
Number?:14
Gum?:cigarettes
Holiday?:Bastille day
Season?:summer
Toothpaste Flavor?:???
Radio Station?:Power 99 FM
Perfume?:D&G Sicily
Scent besides perfume?:sea water
Body part on the opposite sex?:shoulders
FRIENDS AND LIFE
What Do You Want To Be When You Grow Up?:dictator of my man-made, land-locked riviera
How Do You Want To Die?:by my own hand
Turn ons::anything that makes me happy
Turn offs::anything that pisses me off, or takes more than three and a half hours
Which One Of Your Friends Acts The Most Like You?:hmmmm....i would say em and i can be spitting images....
Who's The Loudest?:ty and em
Who Makes You Laugh The Most?:depends
Who Have You Known The Longest?:hmmmm....i honestly dont know
Who's The Shyist?:kait and katie, but only sometimes
When Have You Cried The Most?:i prefer not to remember
What Is The Best Feeling In The World?:feeling like everything is going to work out
Worst Feeling?:feeling like nothing is going to work out, that i had nothing to do with this, and that there is in fact nothing i can do.
Where Do You Want To Live When You Grow Up?:in an apartment. i have an aversion to houses.
If You Could Change One Thing About You What Would It Be?:i would be more trusting, optomistic, and patient.
How Long Do You Think You'll Live?:who knows?
FINISH EACH SENTENCE
Let's walk on the:retaining wall
Let's look at the:ceiling
What a nice:stack of money
Where did all the:single millionaires go?
Why can't we:ever find elegible men?
Silly, little:bitch
Isn't it weird that:i'm not asleep? oh wait, no its not.
Never under any circumstance:drink things from unlabeled bottles
I wish:I could beat the shit out of about twenty people without consequence.
Everyone has a:dirty little secret.
I am:the best or worst thing that just may happen to walk into your life.
HAVE YOU EVER
Been In Love?:Yes
Been To Juvie?:No
Mooned Someone?:No
Been Rejected?:Yes
Ran Away From Home?:Yes
Pictured Your Crush Naked?:What about just getting them naked?
Skipped School?:All the time.
Thought About Suicide?:Yes
Slept Outside?:Yes
Laughed So Hard You Cried?:Yes
Cried In School?:Yes
Thrown Up In School?:Yes
Wanted To Be a Model?:No
Cheated On Someone?:Yes
Done Something Really Stupid That You Still Laugh At Today?:Unfortunately
Seen A Dead Body?:Yes
Been Bitched Out?:Yes
Drank Alcohol?:Yes (hahahahahhaha!!!!)
Smoked?:Yes
Been On Drugs?:Wrote the book
Eaten Sushi?:Daily
Been On Stage?:Hated it
Gone Skinny Dipping?:Yes
Shoplifted?:Yes
Been Drunk?:Yes
Been Called A Tease?:Yes
Been Beaten Up?:Again, unfortunately
DO YOU
Swear?:I'm from Jersey
Sing Well?:Maybe
Shower Daily?:That all depends
Want To Go To College?:There
Want To Get Married?:Fuck no
Believe In Yourself?:Usually
Get Motion Sickness?:Rarely if ever
Think You Are Attractive?:Sometimes
Get Along With Your Parents?:At this point, rarely
Like Thunderstorms?:Love
Play An Instrument?:Three
Own An IPOD?:Two
Pray?:No
Go To Church?:Jewish, and a bad one at that
Sleep With Stuffed Animals?:No
Keep A Journal/Diary?:Not really
Dance In The Rain?:Oh yes
Sing In The Shower?:sometimes
THIS OR THAT
Pepsi or Coke?:Coke
McDonald's or Burger King?:McD's
Single or Group Dates?:Either
Chocolate or Vanilla?:Vanilla
Strawberries or Blueberries?:Strawberries
Meat or Veggies?:Meat
TV or Movie?:Both
Guitar or Drums?:????
Adidas or Nike?:Addies
Chinese or Mexican?:Mexican
Cheerios or Corn Flakes?:Corn Flakes
Cake or Pie?:Cake
MTV or VH1?:MTV
Blind or Deaf?:Deaf
Boxers or Briefs?:Depends
CAN YOU
Do The Splits?:No
Write With Both Hands?:No
Whistle?:Yes
Blow A Bubble?:Yes
Roll Your Tongue In A Circle?:Yes
Cross Your Eyes?:Yes
Walk With Your Toes Curled?:Just tried it, yes
Touch Your Tongue to Your Nose?:Almost
Dance?:hmmmm
Eat Whatever You Want And Not Worry?:I smoke so much it doesn't make a difference
WHO WAS THE LAST PERSON
You Touched::That's a state secret
You Talked To On The Phone::Mother
You Instant Messaged::Em
You Hugged::Refer above
You Yelled At::Mother
You Played A Sport With::Can't remember
WHAT'S THE LAST
Time You Laughed?:Three days ago
Time You Cried?:No response
Movie You Watched?:Epic Movie
Flavor Of Gum You Chewed?:Don't remember
Joke You Told?:Don't Remember
Song You've Sung?:Folsom Prison Blues
RIGHT AT THIS MOMENT
Where Are You?:Floor
What Can You See Out Your Window?:Not looking
Are You Listening To Music?:Yes
What Are You Wearing?:Sweatshirt, slutty cheerleader shorts
What's On Your Mousepad?:laptop
BELIEFS
Do you believe there is life on other planets?:Unless they have some killer shopping or highly advanced vodka, I don't care
Do you believe in miracles?:No
Magic?:No
Love at first sight?:Yes
God?:No
Satan?:Yes
Ghosts?:YES
Santa?:No
Evolution?:YES
IN A BOY...
Fav Eye Color::Deep green, otherwise black
Fav Hair Color::Black
Short or Long Hair::Whatever looks best
Height::at least 5'10
Weight::Whatever looks best
Best Clothing Style::Flexible
RANDOM
What Country Would You Most Like To Visit?:Ethiopia
Number Of CD's I Own::too many to count
Your Good Luck Charm::Number 14
How many pillows do you sleep with?:At least three
Do you drink milk?:rarely, usually with vodka
Person You Hate Most::Oh, would you like a list?
Most Outdated Phrase::okie dokie
Do you think God has a gender?:How could he, seeing as he doesn't exist?
Where do you think we go when we die?:Neiman Marcus
How many rings until you answer the phone?:Two
What is something scientists need to invent?:Hmmmm...
Are you a health freak?:No
Are you a virgin?:No
If you could travel into space, where would you go?:Why the fuck would I do that?
What is the worst weather?:Cold, freezing rain
Did you play with Barbies as a child?:Oh yes.
How many grades have you failed?:Never happened, not saying that it never will.
Take this survey | Find more surveys | MySpace Surveys
Bzoink - The Original Survey Site

Do you love it?

A 200 Question Fun Survey 4 Myspace (All The Bzoink Surveys Put Together)
Full Name::
Birthday::
Birthplace::
Eye Color::
Hair Color::
Height::
Weight::
Right handed or Left handed?:
Your Heritage::
My Worst Habit::
Zodiac Sign::
Shoe Size::
Pants Size::
Innie or Outie?:
Parents Still Together?:
The Shoes You Wore Today::
Your Weakness::
Your Fears::
Your Perfect Pizza::
Goal You Would Like To Achieve This Year::
Your Most Overused Phrase On An Instant Messenger:
Thoughts First Waking Up::
Your Best Physical Feature::
Your Bedtime::
Your Most Missed Memory::
MY FAVORITES:
Favorite color?:
Food?:
Sport?:
Animal?:
Ice Cream?:
Candy?:
Store?:
Salad Dressing?:
Actor?:
Song?:
Letter?:
Number?:
Gum?:
Holiday?:
Season?:
Toothpaste Flavor?:
Radio Station?:
Perfume?:
Scent besides perfume?:
Body part on the opposite sex?:
FRIENDS AND LIFE:
What Do You Want To Be When You Grow Up?:
How Do You Want To Die?:
Turn ons::
Turn offs::
Which One Of Your Friends Acts The Most Like You?:
Who's The Loudest?:
Who Makes You Laugh The Most?:
Who Have You Known The Longest?:
Who's The Shyist?:
When Have You Cried The Most?:
What Is The Best Feeling In The World?:
Worst Feeling?:
Where Do You Want To Live When You Grow Up?:
If You Could Change One Thing About You What Would It Be?:
How Long Do You Think You'll Live?:
FINISH EACH SENTENCE:
Let's walk on the:
Let's look at the:
What a nice:
Where did all the:
Why can't we:
Silly, little:
Isn't it weird that:
Never under any circumstance:
I wish:
Everyone has a:
I am:
HAVE YOU EVER:
Been In Love?:
Been To Juvie?:
Mooned Someone?:
Been Rejected?:
Ran Away From Home?:
Pictured Your Crush Naked?:
Skipped School?:
Thought About Suicide?:
Slept Outside?:
Laughed So Hard You Cried?:
Cried In School?:
Thrown Up In School?:
Wanted To Be a Model?:
Cheated On Someone?:
Done Something Really Stupid That You Still Laugh At Today?:
Seen A Dead Body?:
Been Bitched Out?:
Drank Alcohol?:
Smoked?:
Been On Drugs?:
Eaten Sushi?:
Been On Stage?:
Gone Skinny Dipping?:
Shoplifted?:
Been Drunk?:
Been Called A Tease?:
Been Beaten Up?:
DO YOU:
Swear?:
Sing Well?:
Shower Daily?:
Want To Go To College?:
Want To Get Married?:
Believe In Yourself?:
Get Motion Sickness?:
Think You Are Attractive?:
Get Along With Your Parents?:
Like Thunderstorms?:
Play An Instrument?:
Own An IPOD?:
Pray?:
Go To Church?:
Sleep With Stuffed Animals?:
Keep A Journal/Diary?:
Dance In The Rain?:
Sing In The Shower?:
THIS OR THAT:
Pepsi or Coke?:
McDonald's or Burger King?:
Single or Group Dates?:
Chocolate or Vanilla?:
Strawberries or Blueberries?:
Meat or Veggies?:
TV or Movie?:
Guitar or Drums?:
Adidas or Nike?:
Chinese or Mexican?:
Cheerios or Corn Flakes?:
Cake or Pie?:
MTV or VH1?:
Blind or Deaf?:
Boxers or Briefs?:
CAN YOU:
Do The Splits?:
Write With Both Hands?:
Whistle?:
Blow A Bubble?:
Roll Your Tongue In A Circle?:
Cross Your Eyes?:
Walk With Your Toes Curled?:
Touch Your Tongue to Your Nose?:
Dance?:
Eat Whatever You Want And Not Worry?:
WHO WAS THE LAST PERSON:
You Touched::
You Talked To On The Phone::
You Instant Messaged::
You Hugged::
You Yelled At::
You Played A Sport With::
WHAT'S THE LAST:
Time You Laughed?:
Time You Cried?:
Movie You Watched?:
Flavor Of Gum You Chewed?:
Joke You Told?:
Song You've Sung?:
RIGHT AT THIS MOMENT:
Where Are You?:
What Can You See Out Your Window?:
Are You Listening To Music?:
What Are You Wearing?:
What's On Your Mousepad?:
BELIEFS:
Do you believe there is life on other planets?:
Do you believe in miracles?:
Magic?:
Love at first sight?:
God?:
Satan?:
Ghosts?:
Santa?:
Evolution?:
IN A BOY...:
Fav Eye Color::
Fav Hair Color::
Short or Long Hair::
Height::
Weight::
Best Clothing Style::
RANDOM:
What Country Would You Most Like To Visit?:
Number Of CD's I Own::
Your Good Luck Charm::
How many pillows do you sleep with?:
Do you drink milk?:
Person You Hate Most::
Most Outdated Phrase::
Do you think God has a gender?:
Where do you think we go when we die?:
How many rings until you answer the phone?:
What is something scientists need to invent?:
Are you a health freak?:
Are you a virgin?:
If you could travel into space, where would you go?:
What is the worst weather?:
Did you play with Barbies as a child?:
How many grades have you failed?:
Take this survey | Find more surveys | MySpace Surveys
Bzoink - The Original Survey Site

4.6.07

Things I do at the library

1. Survey the crowd and think to myself: who would look like an attractive human being following a makeover?

2. Speculate as to who might have possibly had a sex change.

3. Demand an explanation as to why Penthouse is not in the periodical section.

4. Barricade myself into one of the cubicles with one of my numerous text books, pull legs up to chest and put on the "I'm going to crack at any second" face, and just see how people react.

5. Pretend not to speak English while reading a book in English--you would not believe how violently people react to this (honestly, I would not suggest it).

1.6.07

Yea baby I got the potion

I have five minutes, you ( yes YOU, the person reading this) obviously are either avoiding something or have nothing on your plate to even avoid, like a starving little ethiropian you are. Yes, let’s refect on the general composition of my drinks:

70/30, more known as the drink I enjoy while relaxing with friends, at around 6 pm college time, which, to translate, is about five pm normal working person time (NWPT, from hereon out). The 70/30 has the unique property—IF AND ONLY IF mixed with cran juice—of not tasting like poison while getting you fucked up.

80/20, more often known as the 10:30 (NWPT midnight) ease on into the flow potion. Usually follows about four 70/30’s, and is a natural gateway into party central.

90/10, otherwise known as shot-with-a-sip-of-chaser, as in the thing you knock back while walking out the door.

100/100, which I like to warmly call the oh-shit-its-family-time drink. Also taken liberally when I have to deal with planes.

For those of you who are either blind or blindingly stupid, this is what professionals often call a cry for help, which I like to interpret as a plea for a vacation.

21.5.07

What I do to vent my frustration on trains

I would say a god half of my life--between travel, college in the midwest (read: mid-nothing) and trips up and down the east coast--has been spent in trains, planes and automobiles. My skills in self entertainment have kept pace.

There is something so satisifying about defacing the hell out of Lindsey Lohan's goddamn awful photo spread in this month's Nylon. Oh, did that just really come out of my mouth? What I meant to say was I productively used my time sitting on the cement fucking floor of Penn Station to think of some new looks for LL.



The demonic kitty look is so coming back.



The 80s crack ho look is equally fitting.

Apparently nothing hurts Lindsey's little cocaine coated black heart than feeling all alone. Now, as someone from an equally fucked up family.....on further reflection, no I can't be compelled to give a fuck.

19.5.07

Just when I thought the Parisians had a monopoly on bizarre protests:



This crime against fashion and tin foil is, in fact, for the great cause of protesting international imperialism, as part of the protests that rocked cities like Portland a few years back. Now, honestly, if I were one of the international movers and shakers at the G8 conference and saw shit like this, I would try to speed up globalization as fast as I could, with the smug knowledge that once international commerce reaches its height, idiots like this will be too busy in a frantic search for a job to busy themselves with such spectacles.

Just a thought.